Star Wars & I

There's a few brilliant videos floating round the net, showing mash-ups of two of my favourite films - Star Wars and the British 1987 comedy cult Withnail & I, starring Richard E Grant, Paul McGann and Richard Griffiths.

Part 1 - http://vimeo.com/57980039

Parts 2 & 3 -

Part 4 - http://vimeo.com/55346666

"There is, I think you'll find, a certain Je ne sais quoi oh-so-very-special about a firm... young... carrot!"

Slow Train

Millers Dale for Tideswell
Kirby Muxloe
Mow Cop and Scholar Green

No more will I go to Blandford Forum and Mortehoe
On the slow train from Midsomer Norton and Mumby Road
No churns, no porter, no cat on a seat
At Chorlton-cum-Hardy or Chester-le-Street
We won't be meeting again
On the slow train

I'll travel no more from Littleton Badsey to Openshaw
At Long Stanton, I'll stand well clear of the doors no more
No whitewashed pebbles, no "Up" and no "Down"
From Formby, Four Crosses to Dunstable Town
I won't be going again
On the slow train

On the main line and the goods siding
The grass grows high
At Dogdyke, Tumby Woodside, and Trouble House Halt

The sleepers sleep at Audlem and Ambergate
No passenger waits on Chittening Platform or Cheslyn Hay
No-one departs, no-one arrives
From Selby to Goole, from St Erth to St Ives
They've all passed out of our lives
On the slow train

On the slow train
Cockermouth for Buttermere
On the slow train
Armley Moor, Arram
Pye Hill and Somercotes
On the slow train
Windmill End

Flanders and Swann

Soubry takes on Mr Toad

Poop poop! The poor old Ukip leader, Mr Toad himself, was in for a battering from Tory defence minister Anna Soubry this week on BBC Question Time.

Ms Soubry, formerly public health minister, makes one or two rather good points!

Ed Miliband's Dad killed my kitten!

Ed Miliband cracking a funny as he accepts an award from The Spectator this week.

ShadCab

Labour's newly reshuffled Shadow Cabinet was announced while I was on holiday. In mid-October, they met for the first time and the opportunity was taken to pose for a ShadCab photo (photo comes from Caroline Flint's Twitter account). But just who's who in the Shadow Cabinet of Ed Miliband?

Back row -
Wayne David MP, PPS to Ed Miliband (not ShadCab)
Tristram Hunt MP, shadow education secretary
Ivan Lewis MP, shadow Northern Ireland secretary
Lord Bassam, chief whip (House of Lords)
Owen Smith MP, shadow Wales secretary
Michael Dugher MP, shadow Cabinet Office minister
Iain McNicol, Labour Party general secretary (not ShadCab)
Jon Cruddas MP, coordinator of Labour policy review
Vernon Coaker MP, shadow defence secretary

Middle row -
Andy Burnham MP, shadow health secretary
Caroline Flint MP, shadow energy secretary
Ed Balls MP, shadow chancellor of the exchequer
Ed Miliband MP, leader of the opposition
Harriet Harman MP, deputy leader of the opposition, shadow culture secretary
Yvette Cooper MP, shadow home secretary
Emma Reynolds MP, shadow housing minister
Hilary Benn MP, shadow communities secretary
Baroness Royall, shadow leader of the House of Lords
Mary Creagh MP, shadow transport secretary
Gloria de Piero MP, shadow equalities minister
Jon Trickett MP, shadow minister without portfolio
Rachel Reeves MP, shadow work and pensions secretary

Front row -
Jim Murphy MP, shadow international development secretary
Margaret Curran MP, shadow Scotland secretary
Chris Leslie MP, shadow chief secretary to the treasury
Angela Eagle MP, shadow leader of the House of Commons
Sadiq Khan MP, shadow justice secretary
Maria Eagle MP, shadow environment secretary
Douglas Alexander MP, shadow foreign secretary
Emily Thornberry MP, shadow attorney general
Rosie Winterton MP, opposition chief whip
Liz Kendall MP, shadow health minister

(Chuka Ummuna MP, shadow business secretary, was absent on business).

Jerusalem

A little something from Spitting Image...

And did those feet in ancient times
Walk upon England's lower class?
And did our forefathers of old
Tell them to get up off their arse?
And did they try to pass the blame
For all of their society's ills?
And now we're just the same, only worse;
We've closed the dark satanic mills

Bring me Victorian values of old
Bring me inflation that is low
Bring me your cash - oh, business fold!
But don't bring me your tales of woe
I shall not turn from my great plan,
No matter how insane it seems:
Til we have built Jerusalem
And made it look like Milton Keynes

Sadly, as appropriate today as in the 1980s.

One from the riverbank

The world has held great heroes
As history books have showed
But never a name went down to fame
Compared with that of Gove!

The clever men at Oxford
Know all there's to be knowed
But none of them know half as much
As intelligent Mr Gove!

The animals sat in the Ark
Their tears in torrents flowed
Who was it said "There's land ahead!"?
Mr Gove!

The world has held great heroes
As history books have showed
But never a name went down to fame
Compared with that of Gove!
Intelligent Mr Gove!
Encouraging Mr Gove!

(With apologies to Kenneth Grahame)